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i want to be healthy again - HappyDistractions
May 9th, 2008
11:25 pm

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i want to be healthy again
im writing from brooklyn.
everyone is still at school.
i have medically withdrawn.
i am free.
its really weird.

so im just watching john adams. i was supposed to meet up with leah but its really shitty out.
i can only imagine what is going on at umass.
harry is still there which saddens me. i miss him.
harry is unlike anyone that could ever exist. he is real. he is exciting. he is silly. he is everything to me.

BUT so last night!
i watched lost.
i didnt think anything was going to do on.
but as a couple of us walked back from north apartments, i walked in on harrys room.
and to my surprise, there was a surprise party for me!
what joy! it was splendid.

everyone was there!
it was a night!
everyone has a great time.
and when we got kicked out, we all went outside and chalked the whole quad.
it was just the way to go out.
i will miss people. and those people i will keep in touch.
others were nice in their time and i will always remember umass.
umass.

um...ass



so i know this delusional girl. she thinks im this horrible person--disgusting in fact. and for what reason? i didnt include her in my life after her true nature (rather obnoxious, loud, terribly insecure, stubborn, and outright rude) became known. i mean how obvious does one have to act to make the point: you and i do not connect. i mean, i was being nice to a person that was not a very nice, or good person.

i have known one person before her who is similar. and society has term to describe such a person: bitch. and at one time, the latter girl and her unfavorable opinion of me really made me sad. i actually believed her. but then i grew up and the realized that i cant make her issues my issues. just because she thinks im a horrible person (for bullshit reasons. literal bullshit) doesnt actually make me a horrible person.

and so this morning when the former girl messaged me on some kind of tyrant, i giggled, somewhat expecting such an action from her. see, last night i called her in regards to clothes she has of mine that i just want returned. for obvious reasons, i should get my clothes back. i mean COME ON! you practically STEAL them from me, and all of a sudden you can keep them as ransom? a punishment? justice for me doing such wrong against you? and then, get this, the girl has the audacity to tell me that i am immature, childish, need to act my age, etc.

my friends and i get such entertainment out of her little rants to me. she accuses me of having bad character, when in reality, i do. she says im a sociopath. I FUCKING WISH! seriously, there are times when im thinking too much of others and neglecting myself; my body feels weak from the amount of emotion that is flowing in my veins.

oh! this i find hilarious!!! she wrote something about me in her livejournal. and i was supposed to read it and know she was talking about me. and since i didnt do either, she believes she has more reason to being outraged. my goodness. i apologize if i do not know you are talking about me. im barely ever on livejournal anymore. ive been writing less and less. i only check ohnotheydidnt. and i did write a previous entry about her. i didnt include her name (just like im not now) because thats ridiculous. it would make the entry too much of an attack. it was a way for me to reach out to her. childish? i dont think so.

but enough about that hunchback girl who desperately needs to start wearing some concealer. i mean if she doesnt already know that people dont like her, i dont know if she'll ever learn. her friends (the very ones that she associates with) have said some really nasty things about her. if she only knew...

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